Well, hello ladies and gentlemen. You probably didn’t expect to see me because I haven’t showed up since that Cinder review –when was that again? You probably thought I was dead, which I might be, to be honest. I went to the gym last night for the first time in like three months, and I didn’t feel any pain at all while exercising. All the pain rushed through when I had to climb the stairs up to the apartment; I would’ve rather skipped that part of the day. The keyword today is ‘skip’.
At the moment, I’m reading Kafka on the Shore, and that’s the first Marukami book I ever pick up. Honestly, I thought I would be done with it by now, but some parts of it are so slow that I just have to put the book down and go take a walk or something. Anyway, I thought I should make a little post, especially something that I’ve thought about several times recently. I’m the kind of person who drops a book if I don’t like it. But sometimes, I’m interested but not enough to read everything. Sometimes, I’m really interested, but some things just make me uncomfortable and I just have to lunge past them. And sometimes things just bother me, but they’re just technical things so I can’t do much about them. So I decided to make a list.
- Unnecessary technical details that do not add ANYTHING to the story, but only show off the extent of a character’s knowledge regarding something or a concept, or the extent of research the author has done for the story’s sake. Most of the time it just makes me feel confused, as though I walked into a calculus class or something.
- Anything that’s more intimate than a kiss makes me cringe in my seat. So I skip all heated scenes, should the books I pick up ever contain any. (Kafka on the Shore has several of those; I did not see them coming.)
- A first person perspective description of a female, especially in YA. If it goes on for more than a paragraph, I probably just go all, “yeah, yeah, you’re just average,” in my head and move on. I don’t care how you feel about make up right now, I know you’ll be putting it on midway through the story for some kind of fancy event or another.
- A personal autobiography in the first chapter of the book. And God have mercy on my soul if it turns into a biography about the best friend, then the annoying brother, then the careless mother. Honestly, I’d rather you showed me that as the story progresses, than have you throw facts at my face when I don’t even know you. This always feels like, “Whoa, back off! We haven’t even gotten started yet.”
- Ghosts and spirits and exorcisms and all the weird supernatural stuff. Like, for me, there’s a thin line between fantasy and supernatural. I may LOVE fantasy, but Marukami is helping me discover that I never know what’s going on in a story that the characters of are juggling several souls in one body. As though they’re tiptoeing on the line that separates our realm from all others. It just overwhelms my capability to absorb what really is going on.
- Excessive plot twists. There’s a book that doesn’t make you know what to believe –think Sherlock Holmes. And some books just make it hard for you to believe anything because of the ever-changing state of everything. This sort of thing just exhausts and makes me feel like ripping my hair out. I’m a fickle person; the last thing I need is a story that can’t make up its mind.
- I had to think of a 7th thing because 6 just sounded lame and 7 is my favourite number. Then it came to me. Love triangles. Oh. My. God. I cannot explain how much this ‘romantic’ aspect bothers me. What can really ruin a novel for me is a love triangle. Whenever a story’s events trace out a love triangle, I’m reminded of stories I used to write between 7th and 10th grade. And if I’m reading anything that sort of resembles/reminds me of stuff I wrote back then, I start feeling bad about not being a published author. PS. I had a male character that was as cosmopolitan as Etienne Saint Clair, but his name was Taylor Dawson, and all the time I was reading Anna and the French Kiss, Taylor was all I could think about. He lived in France too, you know?
So, tell me about the things that bother YOU in the books you decide to read. Are any of the things on my hate-list on your love-list? Do you ever skip anything in a book? Let me know of what you think in the comments. Or if you want, you can make a blog post and link it in the comments and I’ll go check it out.
Never forget that we can always be bookish buddies.
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